Wednesday, December 17, 2025

learning curve

It's always like that, right? The startup costs are huge, the learning curve is long. Eventually you get up to speed with it and it becomes smooth sailing. With bumps, but with time -- fewer bumps, calmer seas. Until the next new app/device/pet/sport whatever comes along and you're back there grinding your teeth and pulling your hair out.

Setting up my smart bird feeder was a challenge. I couldn't sync the device to the app and to my WiFi. Not my fault. Something to do with my WiFi company apparently. That's as educated as I am on the subject. But I did fix it, despite the fact that my feeder appears to be a product of Slovenia and trying to reach a person to help you fix problems is basically not possible. You spin from one set of FAQs to the next and hope that eventually you'll find something that fits your needs. Or, you go to the CHAT box and you initiate a nonsensical conversation with some bot called CHIRP, who will not understand your problem.

You can become frustrated, or you can remind yourself that eventually it will all sort itself out. After all, people in Slovenia are technologically very clever, and the device likely works well if you know what you're doing which I clearly do not.

The good news is that I have set up the camera successfully and this morning (drum roll!) two birds came to my birdhouse! I clicked and snapped ten photos. The birds were beautiful, the sky was blue, everything was grand, except... where are the photos now? I cannot tell you. Where is the information I'm supposed to get on these birds? I do not know. A banner appeared momentarily telling me that House Finches came by to visit, but this is all I know.

I'm not surprised that birds flew over to explore. The day is sunny and just above freezing. No sweater weather for Henry! 



I turned my pooch away from his usual morning path and took him to a big field, not so much to romp, but to enjoy a trudge across a field of undisturbed snow. I'd forgotten how much my pup loves to dig in these fields, pushing away snow in search of... I dont know what. Dead rabbits? Buried treasure? 

Well, if it makes him happy...



Breakfast, where Henry wants so much for me to increase his food intake. 

 

 

It's tempting. My pup is obviously still growing. Here, take a look at how tall he is when he jumps up with bouts of affection for me:



Am I a little worried about his size and strength? Not at all! Maybe I love tall guys? My father was pretty short. Should we run this through a psychoanalytic chatbot? Nah... I just love my Henry and he happens to be very tall -- all part and parcel of his wonderfulness.

He is at daycare, I go over to the farmette. The day is warm enough for the chickens to emerge from the barn. And for Pancake to stare at me coming up the driveway.



Ed had gone skiing yesterday and was feeling like perhaps two days in a row was a bit much, but I pointed out that the warming trend has begun. We may not get another opportunity anytime soon.





And then I come home and yes, I should wrap, but instead, I spend the time trying to understand my smart -- clearly smarter than me -- birdfeeder. It is not until many hours later that I finally locate my first photo of my first finchy visitors.

 


 

Once I am done troubleshooting this troublesome device, it is time to pick up Snowdrop.



(We read, then she reads and I fix the Christmas tree. A string of lights stopped working. Up goes a new one.)


 

 

I have to take her back to school in the evening because it appears that there is a school orchestra concert tonight. I'm not going. Ive got Henry on my hands, and, too, there's her level of interest in playing (it's pretty low -- she never practices). Her mom and brother will be there. Me, I pick up my boy. It's a fast turnaround for us too: he has his last dog training session right after supper. The Beginners one. Next year he moves on to the Intermediate level!

(a graduation diploma!)


 

He has learned a lot, true enough, though the greatest benefit for me, his trainer, is watching how the instructor approaches the whole saga of dog training. With treats of course, but also with an understanding of the dog's temperament. Not all dogs will lie down for you in their first year of training. Especially big dogns like my guy. Henry will sit at a bat of an eye, but he rarely goes down to the floor unless he wants to nap. 

(Today's lesson? Leave It and Wait. He already does a Hang Back in the elevator, which is pretty much the same as Wait, but the Leave it is an interesting challenge! But Henry is smart: when he wants to learn, he learns.)


 

And speaking of napping, might we go to bed earlier tonight? No? Well, let's try!

with so much love... 

 

Tuesday, December 16, 2025

seriously, let's get to it!

Sometime around midnight, Henry came to my side and found my hand to nudge. I thought maybe he wanted to go outside, but while I waited, nuzzling him lightly, he wagged his long tail, turned around, and went back to his bed. My sweet pooch just wanted to make sure I was still there.

We were up at 6:30 -- a respectable hour, one that he and I are used to. 

(Sunrise today is at 7:23; the winter sky so often displays splendid colors just before...)


 

 

It is still a cold morning, so on goes the sweater. 

 

(waiting for the elevator) 


I had to smile. These doggies sweaters, while not expensive, have multiplied far in excess of his needs. This is what happens when you buy the wrong size again and again, then rush to replace it quickly because of that Arctic blast. In the end, the coldest temps were when he was at doggie camp and though I packed his sweater, they told me he played outside without it and did not rush to go for a walk with any of the people there. Yes, there will be cold mornings in January, February, March, and he will wear those wraps for sure, but I can see that a good half of them I can donate to the shelter.



As I walked him along his favorite once grassy spaces (now covered with snow), I thought again about the dogs in downtown Chicago. It was depressing to watch their walks along busy streets with no grassy areas at all to sniff or use for a doggie's outdoor needs. I suppose a small pooch would be okay. The family I lived with in New York when I was nannying their child had a Yorkie. A yappie dog that was so small, I was always afraid I'd step on him and break his spine. The butler/chauffeur would take the pooch out to the curb a couple of times a day and that seemed to be okay for this dog that did not appear to crave the great outdoors. On weekends we'd go to their place in Connecticut, with lots of space for a dog to enjoy, but the Yorkie stayed inside. He seemed baffled by nature. But why would anyone keep a large dog in the commercial heart of the city, especially in a place without a park nearby? What luxury to have so many places to walk a dog here, even in the rather commercial neighborhood where I live.

Breakfast. My pooch is hungry! Even after I feed him and sit down to my own breakfast, he comes over and waits. Or, is it that he just wants one more rub, a few more sweet words?



Okay, Henry. I'm just as happy to be with you again.





Much as Henry loves being home again, he also loves his routine of going to doggie daycare. Perhaps he missed Goose? And his other pals there? By the time we drive up, Henry is whining to go inside!

And now I have before me a day where I really have to get moving on Christmas preparations. Light grocery shopping followed by wrapping. Well, that was the plan. I take out my birdhouse (I kept it inside while I was away) and I hang it, waiting once again for birds to show up.

It's a windy day and the feeder is swinging as if pumped by a child's knees.  That can't be good. I should anchor it to the pole. As I go about changing things around outside, I shake my head at the time I have spent on the birding project. Though I will have taken precautions to keep the birds healthy and safe, it is still the case that bird feeders are a as much if not more for the humans who put them out as they are for the birds. Yes, some birds will benefit from a supplemental clean food source, so long as you dont have cats around, but the greater benefit is there for the people who want to in this way connect with nature. I realize that. Birdsong, bird movement -- I want to hear it, see it in the same way that I want to see and smell flowers blooming outside, or feel the strength and beauty of trees in the forest. And there's nothing wrong with being selfish in this way, so long as you are vigilant and do no harm. So far, with no birds yet on my balcony, I can relax my vigilance!

(the tissue paper stars? I made them at my Chicago daughter's house -- she taught me how to fold them)


And then finally, I start in on Christmas wrapping.

 

Late in the day, I pick up Snowdrop at school. 

 


 

 

I was to transport her to her next activity, but she asks if she could opt out for tonight and just come over to the Edge instead.



So did you notice? Over the weekend, she took the brave step of going pixie. Her choice. A scary one, but she took the plunge. Finally, the struggles of keeping a dense head of hair in order is behind her. We're thrilled. No more chasing her with a hairbrush!



And yes, it was pajama day in school. Spirit week calls for pajamas on Tuesday.

We pick up both Henry and Goose. Henry is hyped with having his best bud in the backseat with him. Perhaps that's why, back at the Edge, he comes into the lobby barking away. Woof! -- at people he knows, woof! -- at strangers. Tail wagging, pulling toward home. 

Henry, we've got work to do!

with so much love... 

Monday, December 15, 2025

from one place to the next

There's a lot of chaos and frenzy when you get ready to travel to a place that requires careful preparation. Did I remember the gifts for Primrose? My bag of just-in-case meds? Did I pack the right clothes? Get a thermos of warm tea ready for the drive? Is the car washed? Filled with gas? Are Henry's essentials all there

It is always a relief when you arrive, on time, and you know you haven't forgotten anything. You shift your attention to the events that really make all this worthwhile. Small things: a book read with a grandchild, a recipe discussed with your daughter, tree decorations admired, snatches of conversation, with all of them, but, too, a good listen to their own exchanges, with their friend, with each other. And big things: the Nutcracker, the birthday, meals together. I had recently said to Ed that this is what makes life worth living: those feelings of love that rush forward when you are with the people who are your everything. He still made the case for finding pleasure in solitude, but even though I, too, love solitary moments, and indeed need a good dose of them each and every day, the thing that keeps my wheels turning is lodged there in the in the lives of those whom I deeply love.

But then comes the departure. The sadness of leaving. Of heading away from my daughter's home. Sigh...

 

I wake up again on the late side. The Arctic blast will be receding today, but it's still darn cold outside. Many many degrees below freezing. 

 


Not that you can tell looking out at the blocks of tall towers, with people living one on top of the other. Wouldn't it be interesting to write a book of stories about the inhabitants of one such buildings? Do their worlds overlap? Or is it all a hodgepodge of disconnected universes? Bound in space, but not otherwise?

 

I wont see any of the young family today. They're off at work, in school, the usual Monday doings. I have one item on my list for today -- walk over to Eataly for a breakfast and a quick peak at the foods there.




I love this food emporium! Italy has the biggest number of these stores. Eataly headquarters are in the Piedmont (the northwestern corner of the country) and there are 14 stores in the bigger Italian cities. (The rest of the world has about 25 of them, spread over the continents; of those, 12 are in the US, mostly on the coasts and then this one in Chicago). Walking through the food aisles is a total pleasure, but I have a specific goal today: to pick out a panettone for the holidays. In years past, I'd ordered one online and indeed, you could argue that the very best one is actually made in Texas, but at a whopping price that I will not pay, so here I am looking at the authentic ones from Italy.

Oh, this one looks good! And on sale! The one to the right, with the Amarena Fabri cherries.



I put it in the basket. As I stroll, I notice that it was just one of many panettone displays.



The store is loaded with them, from every corner of Italy! Should I reconsider? Maybe the ones with pears and dark chocolate? Or orange peel from Sicily?




I stay with the cherries.

 

Now for a brisk walk back to the hotel...

 


 

 

I pass a long snaking line. 

 


 

It's so cold! What could they be waiting for? In postwar Poland, we always investigated long lines. What if there are lemons? Or better yet, toilet paper? So I ask these people -- what are you waiting to buy? 

You wouldn't believe the answer: a cup of coffee from the Ralph Lauren store. I can't help bugging them again. Just coffee? What so special about it? I mean, the paper cups are pretty, but really? Coffee? Why? (Notably, there are Starbucks all over the place. No lines.) The young women I badger think about this for a while. Because it's from Ralph Lauren... 

Did I miss the moment when it became super cool to drink coffee from a Ralph Lauren store? 

 

And then I drive back to Madison. Well, I Uber over to retrieve my car, and then I drive back. If it were warmer, I'd take the L train, but I'm still coughing away and the idea of a longer walk isn't doing it for me today.

I'm to pick up Henry at 4 and I've come to town a bit earlier. Perfect opportunity to stop over at the farmhouse and have something warming to drink.

(Maybe Ed's solitude isn't entirely solitary... Pancake now comes inside the farmhouse. So there are three cats that hang out here, and three that hang out in the sheep shed.)

 


 

 

I am of course anxious about Henry. Did he survive camp??

My sweet boy! To say that he is happy to see me is your understatement of the century. Henry is overjoyed. I let him jump all over me. Good thing I did not jump all over him.

Henry got a report card and I was eager to read their assessment of my pooch. 

There were no surprises. They saw him as a sweet, happy, well trained dog (!), a little shy, but with a tender temperament -- a dog who loved cuddles and of course, despite the weather -- loved his time outside. 

Now, you could say that this is a camp in the business of having you, the owner beam with pride, happy to do a repeat visit ASAP, because they love your dog so much.  Yet I think they checked all the right boxes for Henry Bean. Notably absent was a check in the "very talkative" box, giving him a "mellow" instead. Henry is mellow! And sweet! If a little shy.



Unfortunately, we cant go straight home -- he has a vet visit for a booster shot of something or other, plus a flu shot add-on, as the kennel requires it starting next year. I notice that there are benefits reaped from his camp adventure: he is more confident. The clinic? No problem! No hesitation. We walk right in. I want to weigh him. To get him on the scale? Not an issue! My pup is growing up! (Also getting bigger: he has gone from 51 pounds at the time of adoption two months ago, to 56 pounds today.)

Once all that is out of the way, we head straight for the Edge.

Home, for my happy Henry Bean. Never more than a foot away from my side all evening.



with so much love... 

 

Sunday, December 14, 2025

Chicago celebrations

The last time I woke up at 8:30 in the morning? Can't remember. Ages ago. True, I wake up and get up earlier because I like the mornings. I like the delicate light, I like breakfast, I like having the day before me. Nonetheless, it was rather luxurious to not even consider waking up until 8:30.

Outside -- unmentionable temperatures. I'm not sure new record lows were set, but there is a felt imbalance taking place on our planet -- too warm, too cold, too wet, too dry. Today definitely belongs to the too cold category.

View out my window? Same as the last few times I was here! I'll aim the camera that way, for variety.



I Uber to my daughter's place. Many things going on there today. Let me just throw some out to give yo an idea: babka tasting, croissant bread pudding making, girl dancing, and importantly: birthday celebrating!

We are a day off in celebrating Juniper's 4th, nonetheless this is definitely her moment. Presents, cake -- it all falls on this Sunday. And she is ready for it! 

But first, my milky coffee with a slice of chocolate babka from Breads Bakery in NYC. 



Now, about that croissant based baked pudding (translated from a recipe straight from a Venetian kitchen):



While the "pudding" is baking, the kids want to show me a video clip from when Juniper was just two months old. She said the name Primrose! It was her first word... I have my doubts. At two months? It's not an easy word to say, even for a two year old. 

But they find the video clip. And it's true! By some miracle known only to the babe herself, we distinctly hear it -- Primrose.



Okay, croissant pudding is ready! Brunch time.



It is outstanding. I am not kidding. Out of this world good! (I do have to admit, however, that the kids were slightly more impressed with their chosen cookies for dessert.) 



*     *     * 

Let's focus now on the birthday girl!

Are the balloons ready?



Is the girl up from her nap?



Is her sister back from the Nutcracker?  Can I do our famous timed release selfie?



Let the party begin!!

With present opening, a supper of favorite foods...



And of course, the birthday cake. Rainbow, because Juniper loves a good rainbow cake.

Happy,  happy birthday to you!







She will have many firsts in the year ahead. New travel adventures, new school -- those are the obvious ones. She is a determined, imaginative, clever and affectionate child, with a fierce love for her family. May the year truly shine for her!

*     *     * 

The evening ends with a lighting of the Menorah. We have among us an observer of Hanukkah and today is, of course, the first night of Hanukkah. 

 

 

 

To all who are lighting that first candle tonight -- happy Festival of Lights! 

 

with so much love... 

 

Saturday, December 13, 2025

transitions, delights and everything inbetween

They are so observant. They know. They may not always understand the implications, but they sense the direction in which you're heading.They watch, compare, sniff out all that can be sniffed out. And they worry. Dogs in a nutshell. My dog in a nutshell.

The day starts off as it often does now -- with a happy wake-up just before 7. Henry waits until I get dressed, which in the winter isn't exactly a speedy deal. And he is (more or less) patient when I put on his warm jacket. It is 4F (-16C) outside. Could be worse. Indeed, it will get worse. Still, he needs his jacket.

 



I should have put balm on his foot pads, but that would have been weird for him, and he has enough of weird before him today. And he knows it. Even now, on our early morning walk, he is more vocal than he usually is. He looks, considers, pauses.



Sigh... My best ever dog.  


A warm shower feels great. He understands that routine. But things are slightly off for him. For instance, why is there a satchel lying on the floor by the bed? I come out of the shower and note that Henry has chewed up one of the handles. I can't really blame him. It's on the floor. It's an unknown. Maybe it's a toy? For me?

We eat breakfast. 

 


 

I can't read my novel. I'm too distracted by all the steps I have to take to get Henry, my bags, his bags, bags of birthday gifts, laptop, camera, a thermos of hot tea -- into the car by 9. And of course, Henry sees those bags, his favorite toys stuffed into a sack, food, apportioned, in baggies, his blanket, his treats and chewies. 

There, is, however, always time for affection. 

 


 

 

For my brilliant lap dog. 

 


 

 

We drive to Camp K9. He follows me inside. I go over the details of his stay there. There's good news -- someone is picking up their dog unexpectedly earlier. Henry is getting a room upgrade! In an hour, once they clean up the place. In the meantime, the attending person takes Henry's leash. Henry sits down one of his firm sits. No way am I going with her! He hides behind me. I have to lead him to his prison cell. Yes there are other dogs, yes they all have a comfy blanket on the floor. The dogs may hear each other, but they see nothing of interest. I throw treats on the blanket, he munches them, but he is trembling. And I'm crying. My poor sweet dog.

He will be spending time in this Camp's daycare for a good chunk of the day. He'll play with other dogs. He'll like that. But at night and when not with other dogs, he is in a cell. A larger one, with a bed and pictures on the wall and some noise -- a TV maybe? I should have told them that he really likes jazzy Christmas music.

*     *     * 

I drive over to the farmette and pick up Ed for a breakfast date at Paul's Cafe.  Yes, I have to be in Chicago today, but our meet-up there isn't until 4. (I dropped Henry off in the morning because otherwise he would not be eligible for playtime with other dogs.) 

Ed is in a pensive mood. I have no idea what's on his mind. I ask. He tells me -- you, gorgeous, I'm thinking about you. How nice it is here, with you. Not sure that I can trust this account, but I get no more than that.



*     *     *  

The drive to Chicago is uneventful and that's good. I consider not being part of a multi-car pile up to be a splendid outcome. 

Here's the plan for today: Primrose is dancing in the Chicago Ballet's Nutcracker. She is a toy soldier in the party scene (first half) and an angel in the snow scene (second half). There are two performances today -- a matinee, attended by a handful of family members and friends, and an evening show -- attended by me! In between, there is a break and this is when I am to meet up with the whole lot of them.

Since I pull in a few minutes before 4, I find a neighborhood coffee shop -- the Coffee Lab -- to park myself in. Yes, I am in Chicago. 

 


*     *     *

Now comes the time for Primrose to grab a bite to eat. We head out to a nearby Whole Foods where she can have some quick prepared sushi (the girl loves California rolls). Let me assure you, it is a brisk walk. It's freezing outside! These two are utter saints to pause for a photo for me!

 


 


When Primrose returns to the theater to get ready for her next show, I go out to dinner with the remaining members of her family and a good friend of the parents who may as well be family. What else would you call a person who travels all the way from New York to see the little girl dance?

*     *     * 

We eat at Cebu Chicago, described as a modern Filipino restaurant, thankfully within a short walk of the theater. I do not know a whole lot about the food traditions of the Philippines, and I definitely want to find out what I've been missing.

It's great stuff! 



And now the rest of the fam returns home (Juniper's bedtime is fast approaching) and I turn my attention to the Nutcracker. 

 

*     *     * 

Primrose is very musical, so dance comes easily for her. She is, of course, perfectly awesome, and the whole performance is festive and beautiful! I fully expected to not use my camera. However. The announcement before the ballet was to shut off your cellphones and to not take flash photos. Well now!

 (Act I)


 

(Act II)


 

 

I pick up the little dancer afterwards. No flowers for her -- they would not survive this Arctic blast. I owe her a bouquet!

*     *     * 

I take Primrose home, park the car in their neighborhood and Uber over to my hotel -- the Sofitel downtown (what a deal! I can't remember the last time I had a room for $149 per night in the big city!).

I have no idea why, in this large hotel, I always wind up in the same room, or at least one on the same floor with the same view, but I do. Though I get a seasonal mix in there today:



Such a day! Henry, you would have been proud of your human cousin. She danced like a pro! Sleep well, all you canines, and humans who care for them, and for each other.

with so much love...