a beautiful new year

Imagine a candle (Northlands, from Keap) flickering for you as the light of the day fades. Imagine flowers in a jug. Still there, still pink, but some of the heads are slumping. Like a bouquet the day after a wedding, reminding you of how there was all this anticipation and hope and miraculously you came through alive and unscathed, well, maybe a little scrappy around the edges, but still, happy, and still filled with hope, and before you there is this bunch of tired but beautiful pink flowers. And imagine that you have this large chocolate covered gingerbread man. Say like this one:

... and you couldn't think of the right moment to bring him out and now, suddenly it's the new year and it no longer matters, you and your sweetie can just eat him up by yourselves now! Your sweetie asks -- how do you eat this? And you say -- break off any piece you want. And he says -- it's good!

Imagine then sitting down to your laptop at the kitchen table, with that candle, those flowers, that gingerbread fellow and a hot cup of coffee with frothy milk.

This is my late afternoon of the first day of the new year.

I'd stayed up until midnight and then some. Ed did too. We argued whether his computer was more correct or my iPhone was more correct on the final countdown and then we both laughed at the stroke of midnight. Well, my midnight. His came fifteen seconds later.

Happy New Year.

We slept in a little, but then I had some text messages with the young family and that made me curious about the state of the world right now and so I got up. Sometime after 9. A rare late morning for me.

Last night a sleety icy drizzle coated everything. So now we have a layer of icy snow, covered by a light dusting of snow, covered by another layer of icy something or other. The predictions for south eastern Wisconsin are dire for today -- more snow, sleet, ice. The young family had been planning to drive to Chicago, but it just wasn't wise. If you listened to the reports, you heard a lot of such words as "treacherous" and "dangerous." Much to the disappointment of the overtired kids (one stayed up til midnight, two others fell short, but not by a lot). 

Ed eventually came down and joined me for breakfast.

Happy New Year.

The snow is supposed to hit us in the late afternoon. Should we ski before it comes? Yes no yes no yes no. It's so cold outside! 16F (-9C) and dropping. There's a wind. There are clouds. The cranes have left. Yes no yes no yes. We have the hours if not the will.

Still, I can't think of a time I ever regretted going out to ski. We always feel great on the return. I reach for my big bulky parka.

We again choose the county park paths to the right. Not groomed, but also less icy (I think). There is enough snow for us to take the loop into the forest, where I can pause to listen to the silence and be at peace with the world around me.

The thing is, the world is messy and scary and there are a million reasons to be anxious, to be snarky, to come down hard on others and perhaps on yourself while you're at it. But if you're like me, you have these great friends and these babes who love you to pieces (and you love them even more!) and maybe you have a sweetie and maybe you don't but there is still so much sweetness around you, I'm sure of it, right there on a plate, like the gingerbread guy with his dopey smile and sprinkles on his toes, so much sweetness and going forward -- so much love to uncover and hold on to with all your might. No other resolutions or admonishments needed. They dont work anyway. Just hold on to that love and be good to those who share it with you.

Happy New Year!