What a uniquely interesting month! (Is that the best that I can do in summary?) So much movement in my family, without anyone taking trips or going places! (So what movement am I seeing? The passing of the generational torch to the oldest woman on the ship? Okay, I'll take it!) So much that simmered in the background suddenly percolating to the surface! (What, you think that's done now that the calendar page is about to be flipped to October?) And let's not neglect this: so much sunshine! And relief. And love.
What a month.
And September will not let me forget its specialness even on this last day of the month: it's sunny once again. I feel some guilt in writing this: we have the most perfect weather day before us. Warm still. I'm back to shorts! We eat breakfast on the porch!
But, there is that smell of Fall. Seasons don't pause their steady trudge to the next one. They merely allow you time to prepare for what's to come.
It was to be a straightforward day: get a flu shot, water the tubs, pick up kids. But then Ed added a layer of complexity to it by suggesting we bike to the pharmacy. That's at least a half hour ride each way. Pretty!
But it takes time. In fact, the whole excursion takes time. Back by the lunch hour, with time only to quickly douse the tubs. And now I head out to school. Both kids today.
(does not like the change in schedules...)
(a tired boy...)
And this too is complicated because I have the both of them, even though only the one of them has ballet toward evening, so there has to be a parent-child swap of responsibility somewhere in the next three or four hours. All this to say that by the time all kid stuff is behind me and I turn to go home from the ballet drop off, it is very very late.
And why should it matter? End of month, beautiful weather, kids are well, all is as it should be. Except that I'm leaving tomorrow and I have done nothing to prepare for a trip. Suitcase unpacked, thoughts still on everyone and everything but the trip.
And, I have a headache. Not your normal one, but a weird one. And I can't really hear that well. Huh? Someone want to tell me why?
So I don't go straight home. I stop by the local hospital. I have one question only -- did I just have a stroke? But you can't just walk in and ask that when you're 71 and have a history of brain bleeds and who knows what else. They want to do a full work up. On Monday eve. Have you ever been in an urban hospital on a Monday eve? It's their busiest day. People dont attend to troubling illnesses on the weekend. They wait until Monday. And then the place is flooded.
I find out very quickly that I did not have a stroke. But it takes a very, very long time before they are fully satisfied that nothing else is unraveling in my head. And all the time, I am being the pill patient who asks again and again -- can I go home now please? I probably just had some stress stuff going on. Cant I go home? I promise I wont die in the next two hours!
Eventually tests are done, results come in, and everyone is fully satisfied, and I go home.
I had wanted to cook soup for Ed's week alone. In the end, I stole one of his hard boiled eggs and made a salad for the both of us. We ate that for dinner very close to midnight.
My flight out is coming up. And still, I did nothing to prepare for it.
And that's okay! What's October for anyway if not to demand a fresh breath, a new perspective, without preparation, without angst or stress of any sort. I'll plunge right into it! Tomorrow.
