Tuesday, September 18, 2007
one man’s dream…
So, my friend has this house up north…
(translation: a pal who professes not to see dirt, ever, has recently purchased a summer home from a very old couple whose eyesight and physical stamina were such that they could hardly care for themselves let alone a place they hung out in occasionally; said house is a good five hour drive up from Madison)
…and he’s letting us use it for the week-end!
So what state is it in?
Great!
Says who?
Well, I visited there last month, as did his son, as did another buddy of his…
(translation: four guys, none of them ever noticing any dirt anywhere, as opposed to me, who notices it even where it doesn’t exist, recently went up and had a good time hangin’ out in a shack which probably has not seen the likes of Lysol in the last, maybe forty years)
Has the bathroom ever seen the likes of Lysol?
What’s Lysol?
(case in point)
So anyway, we could hang out there and you could write…
(translation: I could write if it didn’t get too cold or if the animals and/or bugs that have probably taken over in the absence of a human scent don’t absolutely get to me, and I could then post things on Ocean about it all, only not while there because, nat, there’s no Internet)
…and we could go swimming in the lake and take some hikes up there and we could take nuts and stuff…
(translation: there’s no store within miles and not only would I need to take provisions, which I then would not cook because I don’t even want to contemplate the state of the kitchen, but I would have to take coffee and that means milk and of course, the refrigerator is likely to be turned off, possibly taken over by a family of mice because it’s warm and comfy and snug in there, when it’s standing empty and turned off)
Are there linens and towels?
Linens and towels? (here, my occasional travel companion, Ed, pauses and rubs his chin, trying to recall his very recent visit there) I’m sure I slept on something and wiped myself off with something…
(translation: one of the guys had a towel and they all used it and then “forgot” to wash it, most likely)
…Anyway, we can wash up stuff there. And take Lysol.
(translation: said week-end will require a half-assed cleaning job, of the type that leaves the strong smell of cleaning product on your hands)
So, I said no to the idea, right?
Oh, but the sun is warm outside and Ed is so eager and excited about this quick jaunt into the northwoods. I imagine that for him, staying up in his buddy’s cabin is like me spending a week-end in Paris. I’m not that unkind.
In the meantime, I’m reveling in the weather and appreciating, while I can, a nice skim double cappuccino. Outside. At a café. In a clean cup, with a yummy scone. You appreciate the things that are soon to be in short supply.
(translation: a pal who professes not to see dirt, ever, has recently purchased a summer home from a very old couple whose eyesight and physical stamina were such that they could hardly care for themselves let alone a place they hung out in occasionally; said house is a good five hour drive up from Madison)
…and he’s letting us use it for the week-end!
So what state is it in?
Great!
Says who?
Well, I visited there last month, as did his son, as did another buddy of his…
(translation: four guys, none of them ever noticing any dirt anywhere, as opposed to me, who notices it even where it doesn’t exist, recently went up and had a good time hangin’ out in a shack which probably has not seen the likes of Lysol in the last, maybe forty years)
Has the bathroom ever seen the likes of Lysol?
What’s Lysol?
(case in point)
So anyway, we could hang out there and you could write…
(translation: I could write if it didn’t get too cold or if the animals and/or bugs that have probably taken over in the absence of a human scent don’t absolutely get to me, and I could then post things on Ocean about it all, only not while there because, nat, there’s no Internet)
…and we could go swimming in the lake and take some hikes up there and we could take nuts and stuff…
(translation: there’s no store within miles and not only would I need to take provisions, which I then would not cook because I don’t even want to contemplate the state of the kitchen, but I would have to take coffee and that means milk and of course, the refrigerator is likely to be turned off, possibly taken over by a family of mice because it’s warm and comfy and snug in there, when it’s standing empty and turned off)
Are there linens and towels?
Linens and towels? (here, my occasional travel companion, Ed, pauses and rubs his chin, trying to recall his very recent visit there) I’m sure I slept on something and wiped myself off with something…
(translation: one of the guys had a towel and they all used it and then “forgot” to wash it, most likely)
…Anyway, we can wash up stuff there. And take Lysol.
(translation: said week-end will require a half-assed cleaning job, of the type that leaves the strong smell of cleaning product on your hands)
So, I said no to the idea, right?
Oh, but the sun is warm outside and Ed is so eager and excited about this quick jaunt into the northwoods. I imagine that for him, staying up in his buddy’s cabin is like me spending a week-end in Paris. I’m not that unkind.
In the meantime, I’m reveling in the weather and appreciating, while I can, a nice skim double cappuccino. Outside. At a café. In a clean cup, with a yummy scone. You appreciate the things that are soon to be in short supply.
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Must be something in the air. I came down with an unexpected case of "yes-itis" today also. Why, why do we say yes when all sense is telling us to politely decline?
ReplyDeleteSofties, that's what we are. (That's OK with me.)
Maybe you could bring some very warm layers and get some type of enclosable mesh hammock or pup tent if the indoors of the place looks too scary. Nature cleanses herself, so if you're in a sunny open area, it won't seem too "dirty" like indoors buildup and air can be. Plus even if you stay up late and get up early, stay out there all night and the stars!! If it's warm enough, don't tell Ed and just have something like that packed as a backup? In case the place is really bad, and you don't want to get worked up emoting on him about not considering a woman's needs, having to spend so much time cleaning, etc. It's the property, not the place, he bought and wants to show you. Have fun and go with the flow! (Is there running water inside at least?)
ReplyDelete--TrollHaugen
So what state is it in?
ReplyDeleteGreat!
Says who?
Lol. I read this wrong originally and was thinking he was being mighty mysterious about having to keep the location a secret from you, not even wanting to tell ya what state it's in.
Have fun! (And better you than me.) Don't forget to make sure our tetanus shot is up-todate, bring a jug of bleach instead of wine, a tube of neosporin and a package of sterile bandages. Paper plates and plastic forks, anyone?
ReplyDeleteJust to clarify: it is Ed's pal who bought the place. (My voice is always in lilac.)
ReplyDeletegentle reminder: I am okay with Anons, so long as you guys post with a name.
ReplyDeleteI have yes-itis also. I think I may need medication for it :)
ReplyDeleteI recommend taking lysol, toilet paper and quarters.
p.s. - I have that book that's on that table. Brings back fond memories.
Don't wimp out! This sounds like fun. Just because the parsley isn't artfully arranged on a plate with dripping syrup in cursive doesn't mean eating and writing adventures aren't in store. (three negatives in one sentence, sigh, and I am suggesting to think positive)
ReplyDeleteLay on!
Sounds like an adventure! I always find that once I'm in one of those situations I get used to the filth and sort of learn to embrace it-- and even have a good time. Have fun!
ReplyDeleteAh! The dreaded torts book!
ReplyDeleteI'm wading through the same one down here at a coffeeshop on Magazine Street near Tulane.