full Monday

I know some retired people who are so incredibly busy (I used to be one of them) that you have to wonder if they like it that way (I didn't). Because most of us do have a say in the matter of how we structure our days now, when the kids are grown and the job is a thing of the past. I didn't have to plant hundreds of flowers each year, or take care of grandkids, or write a post every day. Yet there was something that felt right about plunging fully into all three. And yes, all three filled a good chunk of a day. 

I have slowed down this (academic) year. I pretty much abandoned the farmette flower fields (though not completely -- I'm keeping an eye on what's going on there and I did plant spring bulbs by the dozens). And I reduced my childcare obligations to four days a week. On the other hand, I'm still posting here, on Ocean, and of course, there is Henry, my 8 month old adopted Rottie Dobbie Siberian Pyrenean Mountain Gentle Giant. You could say I'm still looking for the right balance of busy on the one hand,  and free to do whatever strikes me at the moment on the other. I'm closer to that balance now, but I realize, too, that it's a shifting landscape for me: with each year, adjustments have to be made.

My focus right now is definitely on these youngest members of my inner circle: the grandkids, and Henry. Ed likes it when I take the focus off of him. He is proud as pie of his self sufficiency and he never fails to tell me about the last wonderful meal he fixed for himself. Invariably it will have had raw onions and slices of homegrown garlic and tomato. Frequently wrapped in a corn tortilla, with room for Farmer John's cheeses, maybe cheeper eggs (way overcooked, but I'm not saying anything), and a very soft avocado. 

Okay! So let me reflect on how this day suddenly got so packed with such uninteresting tasks. 

It's because it is Monday and I have just come off of a weekend with Henry. He's not a total babe -- I can get stuff done when he is here, but there are some jobs that are better accomplished without his beautiful dark eyes staring at me in puzzlement. Like vacuuming up the car and spreading a protective cover over the back seat. And of course, picking up the week's groceries, which include now lots of Thanksgiving foods. A stop at UPS (to return a toy that is way too small for my Gentle Giant). At the pet store, to pick up those sticks that look like rawhide, but aren't. It all adds up. By the time I sit down for my granola bar and coffee (lunch!) I see that it's just about time to pick up the kids.

 

But wait, how was the earlier morning? Well, we didn't get moving until 6:20, which is the next level of wonderful. 

And I did take in a few chapters of my book over breakfast (they are short chapters).

And then Henry snoozes, while I gaze lovingly at his wonderful huge torso and sleek head, rubbing him occasionally, and of course, trying hard (not too successfully) to preserve this wonderful moment in a selfie.

Then come the chores. Henry is in doggie daycare, I do a bunch of store stop and go's and puff! Time's gone.

The kids had good days in school today...

 

 

 

 

Fortified by their weekly Culver's snack (I set limits!) and holiday Classen's cookies (all this after the fruit bowls), I'd say they had a strong bounce to them this afternoon. And still, mostly we read. And Snowdrop plays her computer game and Sparrow watches, fascinated.

 

 

We pick up Henry together. I do this so that the pooch can get used to their vim and vigor (and therefore the vim and vigor of others). They pounce on him with joy. He's learning not to be scared of that! 

At home, Henry eats and snoozes. He has been napping more, even at day care. To me, that means he has relaxed his guard. Even at doggie daycare they tell me he now takes naps in between bouts of play. But his contentment does make me less inclined to work with him on issues such as separation anxiety. I hate to disturb his newly found peace.

I watch him now play with his new bunny rabbit -- the squeakiest toy I have ever had the pleasure of listening to, and no, Kong dog toy maker, it is not indestructible...

 

 

 

... and I think back to the many conversations I've had with my daughters about this pooch. It struck me just today that the worry I have about keeping him busy, stimulated, active -- is fitting with the new approach we now take to our pets. Like with kids, we tend to worry too much about their boredom. We see it as a mark of our failure: did we not provide enough books, toys, activities, stimulation? Of course you dont want to keep your dog in an empty room for long periods of time, but maybe sometimes it's okay to leave him to his own antics. I packed the weekend for Henry. Perhaps he profited from it. But maybe next weekend, I can take it down a notch. (Or maybe not. I am very focused on the well being of this pooch!)

with so much love...