It’s morning. Nothing has happened thus far. But yesterday… Yesterday! I walked 5 separate and distinct districts: SoHo, Little Italy, Chinatown, Lower East Side and the Snootty district.

You’re begging to be asked. Start with SoHo.
No no. Don’t start there. I went there because I wanted to visit Café Café – I have a t-shirt from Café-Café and I am loyal to places of t-shirt-acquisition fame.

Did they welcome you again with open arms?
Err, they were closed for Yom Kippur.

So then?
I ate lunch in NoHo. Never mind that. Let me move on.

Move on then. Little Italy. You seem to love this place. You think it’s like being in Italy, don’t you?
No, without a doubt, today I felt I was on a movie set. It has been said that Little Italy is a dying community – that the vibrant Chinatown is encroaching on blocks that used to be full of cannelloni and amore. But scroll down to the San Gennaro procession below. Does it give the appearance of a dying ethnic community?