We are none of us impervious to being duped. Of course, we don't admit to that. I think most of us believe we start the day with eyes wide open. And proceed with caution, alert to the possibility that we are being used, manipulated, conned into believing something that is, in fact, a fiction. I'm like everyone else -- smugly thinking I'm in control. That I know my way around. Some (businesses, people) are to be trusted. Others? I'm onto them! I know how to proceed with caution.
Until I trip up and fall flat on my face.
People, companies, entities have histories, backgrounds, needs that just are not that apparent as you walk through the day not really thinking about the veracity of what you hear, read, understand.
And this is why you are duped, more often than you'd like to admit.
I have been duped in big ways and small. I'll give you an example of a small recent one, because the bigger the dupe the longer it would take me to explain it. The small one has to do with the roses. These are the ones where I stepped outside the box of my favorite rose growers and went to Etsy, because that was the only place that claimed to sell the Pomponella, the Dames de Chenonceau, and the Leonardo da Vinci roses. I mentioned this in yesterday's post: the roses arrived, I opened the box and found them quite poorly wrapped, in a Chinese newspaper.
The thing is, I learned last year that Etsy has come to be a platform for many fake Chinese products. I had purchased a couch cover only to see that it was trash. A t-shirt with a cute (pilfered) slogan that was total junk. When I tried to return the products, I entered into a rabbit hole of back and forths. Most often the sellers will ask you to keep the product while they refund you some small percentage of the cost. The longer you engage in the back and forth, the more of a refund you will get. They do not want the product of course, because it's worth less than the shipping would cost. I never buy anything from Etsy anymore without triple checking the veracity of the claims presented and even then, I'm skeptical until the item arrives.
But roses? The sellers list their California or Texas farms and if you ask AI about the legitimacy of the place, you're mostly going to get a thumbs up because frankly, AI is going by the same internet information that you and I are sourcing, and the sellers make sure that they cover their traces. There are a ton of roses sold this way, at reasonable but not ridiculously low prices (so as not to have you doubt the legitimacy of the sale). And I fell for it, buying three, and sure enough, there is no way that they were homegrown on a family farm in California. When I challenged them, they claimed they simply used scrapped newspapers. The give away was when the bargaining began. Keep them and we will refund you 50%. Clearly they dont want me raising flags with Etsy. So much so do they not want this, that they rather quickly agreed to a full refund and offered without me asking, to send a UPS label. So that I can give them five stars on customer service. These poor roses, wrapped in plastic bags, cannot hope to have a good life after all the back and forth transit, but perhaps they'll make good compost for somebody.
I heard of knock-off designer stuff, but this is the first time I came across knock-off roses!
That's my short story. The longer ones are not worth telling. The point is that I feel humbled and duped and really quite the child again, incapable of navigating the world without a helping hand. How could I have been so stupid -- is the thought that's been in my head, over this and over so much more...
Sunny day. Morning walk is beautiful...
Millie and I like the rays of sunshine coming into our windowed corner at breakfast!
I give my pup time to rest this morning. Yesterday they tell me she was wild with the other pups at day care. No rest, all play. I let her catch up on sleep.
And when she is done, and back to playing with her doggie friends, I return to my garden. Two more roses, planted. (Thirteen more are still somewhere other than here!) All roses in the West Rose Garden, watered. Several roses -- admired, because they are still blooming!
(you should never water a rose from the top, but sometimes you just cant help it.)
(looking from the ground up!)
(getting to be late afternoon... the light changes...)
I dont have grandkid pick up today. Again, I follow directives from high up and today is a no day. This does give me time to do a final late fall feed to the grass (which normally I would not do -- lawn runoff is a major pollutant of streams and lakes and water tables -- but my patches of grass are very small now, and I just need to strengthen them a wee bit after two years of total neglect. After that, I'll let nature take her course. I am not and never will be a lawn person, but at the same time, I am delighted with the still blooming clover in my patches of grass. Bees love those white and pink flowers, and, too, it acts like a regular nitrogen factory for the grass, lessening the need for future feedings with fertilizers, organic or otherwise.
Okay, Millie's home! She rests again, I sort through all the paper work of the day. I cancelled a trip. I added another. I decided where I will live after I am no longer able to manage Steffi's House. I sign papers for it. It was a big day!
with so much love...
